Spirituality, Sexuality, & Consent
It's 2019 this year. You're hopefully aware of this. Nationally, we've just come through the huge perspective shift brought on by the #MeToo movement (thank Goddess), founded on multi-wave feminist movements going back decades, all benefitting from brilliant intersectional work done by advocates of all shapes and sizes! What am I talking about? Consent!
Although we hear this word everywhere, it's actually only in the past few decades that we've understood 'consent' as something we can have and give. Consent has not always been seen as equally given/received from people of different races, ages, or marital stauts, to name a few. Consent is a large field of complex histories. And together we get to find our way through it with better and better tools every day.
Personally, consent has most often come up in conversations with ministry colleagues and professional friends when it has been violated and rarely when it has been creatively, playfully enacted for positive sexual encounters. It seems to me that, with a few individual exceptions, sexual consent tends to fall into only three categoris; no, not no, and yes. I want more.
I'm a 34 year-old sober feminist liberal minister. I'm a lover of Magdalena and a friend of Christ. I'm fascinated by incarnation and embodiment and what that means for our spiritual selves. I've had sex with people of many genders and orientations, much of it good, but some of it missing that cherry on top; enthusiastic, creative, playful, life-enlarging consent. Over the past few years I've realized that while I have a good practice of saying 'no' and 'not no', I really want to develop my self-advocacy and enthusiastic yes.
I'm not alone in this desire. Hundreds of folks in kink communities have made an artform of Yes Yes Yes consent. BDSM communities are teaching me how sexy and satisfying it can be to talk with the lights on about nitty gritty details of desire; a dialogue instead of just 'yes' or 'no.' Queer and Poly folks are widening the fields of intimacy by leaps and bounds on a daily basis. Individuals in every community are deepening intimacy with themselves and those they love. And I want as much of that goodness as I can get.
They say that the twin cores of human beings are spirituality and sexuality. Their vibrancy and health depend on one another. When we are spiritually healthy, our sexual health grows and opens, and vice versa. I want to work with you, Seeker, to tap into our twin cores and light ourselves up with ever-widening possibilites for ever greater consent.
I want us to expand our vocabulary of consent so that it becomes a field of playful spiritual potential. I want to build a spiritual architecture of consent with you so that every sexual encounter fills you with both power and tenderness. I want to have a conersation about sex that has more to do with how good it can be than it does with where we've fallen short.
Come join me for my upcoming online course: From 'Not No' to 'Yes Yes YES!' and together let's breathe new life into all our intimate loves. January 13th through February 10th
Four weekly videos from instructor and some very special guests
Self-directed teachings to go at your own pace
Bridge and Boundary building action homework to grow your field of consent
Journaling assignements for solo/partners work
Opportunities to connect with other students in the course and share experiences (anonymity and privacy honored and protected)
Oodles of affordable or free resources for learning about the many fields of consent and play
Individual spiritual care sessions offered at a discounted price
And lots more goodies in store!
You'll come away with:
A greater capacity for including spirituality in your sexuality
Ways to invoke the sacred in your intimate play
Non-sexual practices for expanding your personal field of consent
Tools for pleasure mapping with yourself and others to know what you really like
Identifying 'bridges' and 'boundaries' in the field of spiritual/sexual consent
Journal prompts and partners/solo writing exercises to build boundaries and bridges for consent
Opportunity to share your experiences with others, both challenging and rewarding
Resources for processing and addressing consent trauma, if needed
Lifetime access to materials and videos from the course
Full course description below!
Workshop is $125
Workshop + Individual Spiritual Support Session is $175
From 'Not No' to 'Yes Yes YES!'
Sexuality, Spirituality, & Consent
Online Course description
This four week workshop is an online private classroom designed to give you a vibrant spiritual architecture for consent. Using a combination of videos, music, partner and solo exercises, boundary/bridge building, and loving humor we will discover just how big the field of consent can be. Consent isn’t just ‘Not no’ but something big enough to hold all our desires, fantasies, needs, and healings.
At the end of the four weeks you will have a good foundation for knowing what you want sexually and spiritually, how to ask for it, a deeper understanding of the power of the Yes, and ways to build more and more play into nuanced consent experiences with partners new and experienced.
We’ll cover and provide resources for multiple sexual situations including polyamory, solo exploration, gender/sexual identity, spaces beyond the bedroom, honoring past traumas, pre-setting consent, and consent play without sex.
Course is $125 and goes from January 13th-February 10th with lifetime access to course material.
This course is for people who are ready to play with giving and receiving consent in dynamic new ways. This course is not currently designed for folks who are actively dealing with unresolved trauma around consent violations. If that is you, we still want to help. Please contact us for resources and/or private pastoral counseling sessions. If, during the course, you discover that there is unresolved consent trauma in your past that’s ok and that’s what this course is also for! We will support you in connecting with resources that are right for you as you complete the course.